平庸的大人 Mediocre adults
去了天主教小學的校園觀光日，校園導遊是由兩個六年級的學生帶兩家人導遊的。兩個六年級的學生是標準的老師牌模範生，讓我覺得有點不知如何和他們互動（因為我這麼憤世忌俗）。後來和麥恪旺先生聊起的時候，熊熊記起我自己國小五六年級的時候也是老師牌模範生。
We went to the open day at the Catholic school, and the school tour was given by two year-six students, who were the typical teacher’s pet — and was hard to me to adapt my interaction with them (as I am way too cynical). Later when I was chatting to Mr McWang, I remembered that I was also a goody two-shoes at year-5/-6.
然後我跟麥恪旺先生講我大學時候按小學班導的要求辦了一次小學的同學會，另一位聯絡大家的同學逼忽然打電話問我對某某同學有什麼印象。我說，沒什麼印象啊（除了全班都叫她大奶媽之外我對她真心沒印象）。同學逼說某某同學對於我在全班考試時舉報她作弊這件事對我一直懷恨在心，說她是新生不知道要考試沒有準備所以才作弊。同學逼說起這件我完全沒有印象的事讓我很有愧疚感，因為老娘愉快地度過那麼多年，那某某同學卻十年如一日地懷恨我。我問麥恪旺先生為什麼我明明做的是正確的事，卻要被懷恨，還要有罪惡感。
Then I told Mr McWang about me arranging an elementary class reunion as requested by the teacher when I was in uni. The other classmate B who assisted in contacting classmates all the sudden called me and asked what was my impression on classmate so-and-so. I said, not much of an impression (apart from the fact that the whole class called her big-tits mama, I honestly had no memory of her). Classmate B told me that so-and-so hated me for reporting her cheating in front of the whole class, saying that she was a newly transferred student and that she didn’t know about the pop quiz, did not prepare for it so she cheated. This freshly-revealed hatred resulted from something I completely forgot made me feel rather guilty, as I was living blissfully unaware of the hatred which so-and-so had carried with her for over a decade. I asked Mr McWang why is that I was doing the right thing, yet I had to be blamed for it, and had to feel guilty about doing the right thing.
麥恪旺先生：打小報告會被伉布袋的。
Mr McWang: Snitches get stitches.
我：真的嗎？你真的覺得我做的不對？
Me: Really? You really think that I shouldn’t have done it?
麥恪旺先生：我這麼問吧，妳如果當初沒有舉報她的話，會對什麼人有不好的影響嗎？
Mr McWang: Let me put it this way — if you didn’t report her, would it be bad for anyone?
我：這不是對其他乖乖念書準備考試的學生不公平嗎？
Me: Isn’t that unfair to other students who studied and prepared for the quiz?
麥恪旺先生：發現作弊不應該是老師的事嗎？
Mr McWang: Isn’t it the teacher’s job to notice the cheating?
我：我那時候是班長啊，我覺得維持班上秩序是我的工作。
Me: I was the elected class president, I felt it was my job to maintain the order of the class.
麥恪旺先生：總之，打小報告會被伉布袋，這是操場的規則。
Mr McWang: Anyway, snitches get stitches, that’s the rule of playground.
我：我們又不是在操場上，我們是在教室裡！
Me: We weren’t at the playground, we were in a classroom!
當了老姆之後我最不能接受的是，我們跟孩子說，做好事，做正確的事，但當看見別人做不對的事的時候，睜一隻眼閉一隻眼，什麼都別說。那我們到底是在教導孩子什麼呢？
After being a mum, the hardest concept for me to digest is, we told our kid to do good things, to do the right things. However when seeing others doing the wrong things, look the other way, don’t say a thing. So what are we teaching our kids?
小學的時候我也曾經因為家裡物質條件沒有其他同學好而被同學排擠過。但是我也沒有這樣就決定挖糞塗牆或者對誰記恨在心啊。長大了以後學會看事情不是只看結果，還看原因，學會了得饒人處且饒人。所以也許我長大了也變得平庸了，因為不想被伉布袋所以不想得罪人。
I had been bullied by others in the elementary school for my family not being financially well off like others, but I didn’t decide to revenge the world or think of others in a hateful way. Growing up you learn not to judge a situation from just the outcome, but also the inputs, and you also learn to forgive and forget. So maybe I become mediocre as an adult, as I don’t want to get stitches for snitching.
